My nine-year-old's mood changes are fast and furious these days.
It feels as though one minute we're blissfully dancing in the rain puddles at the park and then suddenly, without warning, we're in a lightning storm, and I'm hanging on for dear life to the metal merry-go-round.
Sound familiar?
It's jarring, triggering, and entirely maddening.
"I just wanted things to be calm. Why is she being like this?"
"How do I get my kids to listen" and "Will you give me the concrete tools I need to make it happen?"
Definitely, the top questions that parents want to know.
"What do I do to get her to pick up her clothes, finish her lunch, turn off the iPad, etc.?"
I ask myself these questions all the time.
I want to preface this by acknowledging that most teachers want the best for their students and do everything possible to make their classrooms safe and emotionally responsive environments. They are our heroes, leaders, and the ones who give us hope that one day, all children will receive the treatment they deserve. Sadly, this is not the case, especially in economically disadvantaged areas where resources are low and toxic stress is rampant.
Misbehavior in the classroom is a hot topic.
I remember when my daughter started first grade, I wondered how she would cope with this new punitive environment.
How would she handle the stoplight system or the unintentional judgment? Would it be stressful for her?
Do your kids nag, complain, or whine about rules and limits?
Do they attempt to negotiate or beg for more TV, candy, toys, or playtime despite repeated warnings that the issue is not up for discussion?
Do you interpret these behaviors to mean that your kids aren't "listening" to you?
Does that make you feel like you have to set firmer limits, but you don't know how?
I've got a solution for you.
