Managing Conflict in Five Steps with Conscious Communication

I want to share with you a step-by-step path to peace. 

Your language, attitude, and tone ALL affect your child's ability to meet your expectations. Learning to change the way you speak can take time and practice.

Sometimes, you won't know WHAT to say. 

Being silent is okay. Being respectful is more important than saying the "right" thing. 

Why Kids Tattle and What To Do About It

She took my headband!
He touched my Legos!
She's using my iPod!
He won't stop bothering us!
She won't stop hitting us!
They spit on us! Eww!

Those are just a few of the "tattletales" I've heard from my daughter over the years. 

Common responses may sound like - 

Give it back!
Put down those Legos!
Leave it alone!
Stop harassing your sister!
That's not nice! 

But, what do kids learn when we respond with directives, demands, and judgment? 

Helping Kids Who Overreact

What is wrong with you?
What is your problem?
You're being ridiculous!
Calm down!


As a kid, I was no stranger to these kinds of sentiments. Overly sensitive and highly-emotional, outbursts were a knee-jerk reaction with which I was quite familiar.

How To Deal With The "Mean Girls"

"Mean Girls" 2004 Image: Fanpop

Has your child run into social troubles (or mean girls) during the transition from early childhood to adolescence?

If I had to pick one movie to describe my teenage years, it would be a cross somewhere between Lucas (1986) and The Craft (1996). 

Always the new girl - likable, but awkward. 

Fitting-in can be a common challenge for girls (and boys). One that has been memorialized in movies such as Tina Fey's, Mean Girls.

This female social game starts around age nine and can heat up during high school.

Why Do Kids Blame Others?

She made me do it.

He's bothering me!

Mooom! She did it AGAIN!

Sound familiar? Maybe a little too familiar?
 
If your children are comfortable playing the blame game, then it might feel like you're always micro-managing conflicts but your kids are never able to reach solutions on their own.

If your kids blame you or blame each other, then this episode of TEACHable Moments is for you!

Transforming Judgment

Do you feel like you try to be empathetic and yet your child's behavior doesn't change?

Are you in the habit of describing the conflict with your child by using words such as, defiant, disrespectful, rude, cranky, instigator, trouble-maker, or manipulative?

5 Steps to Peaceful Conflict Resolution

"But, Lori - what do I do when....

my child won't listen
my child is aggressive
my child refuses

- my child, my child, my child ..."

Have you ever been in the position of not knowing what to SAY or DO next.