Why Time-Out Is A Good Idea

"Mom! Stop, listen!"

"I am listening."

"You don't even know what I'm talking about. You're so annoying!"

Suddenly, the wind had changed, warning sirens were ringing through the air, and an unpredictable twister was headed straight in our direction, determined to steal our sunny morning.

How Not to Raise an Asshole (and other parenting thoughts)

 
Over the years, I have tolerated a lot of snide comments about how I am ruining my child (and the world) by choosing to forgo punishments and rewards in favor of something less controlling.

I have also seen and heard a lot of banter on the internet begging instructing parents on "how not to raise an asshole."

It appears there's a lot of sanctimonious judgment of children (and parents) floating around in cyberspace these days. 

So, I thought I'd jot down a couple of quick tips that I've come to rely on in my own parenting journey.  

What To Do About "Misbehavior" at School

I want to preface this by acknowledging that most teachers want the best for their students and do everything possible to make their classrooms safe and emotionally responsive environments. They are our heroes, leaders, and the ones who give us hope that one day, all children will receive the treatment they deserve. Sadly, this is not the case, especially in economically disadvantaged areas where resources are low and toxic stress is rampant.

Misbehavior in the classroom is a hot topic. 

I remember when my daughter started first grade, I wondered how she would cope with this new punitive environment.   

How would she handle the stoplight system or the unintentional judgment? Would it be stressful for her?

Bring More Love, Fun & Calm Into Your Family

Do you feel like you are always begging, pleading, or insisting that your kids do things?

Has your day-to-day routine lost all sense of play and the lightheartedness that should accompany family life?

When my daughter is resisting everything I say or when it feels difficult to relate to her, I know it is imperative for me to take a look at how often I choose to demonstrate a loving, fun, and calm presence in her life.

How do I act most often when I'm feeling frustrated or facing an obstacle? 

I'm her model. 

If I lose it during those times, how can I expect her to be cooperative and feel connected when she's stressed?

5 Proven Ways to Encourage Responsible Behavior in Your Kids

(Is your child under age 5? Click here for essential rules for communicating with young children)

"How can I be sure that I am encouraging responsible behavior in my children and not letting them "get away with things." - Tina, Mom of 3

This is a common and natural fear most parents have at one time or another.  

As kids grow past the preschool years, we typically expect them to display better behavior and more responsible actions.
 
However, what about those kids who don't seem to move past the meltdowns, or can't seem to stop and think before they act?

What's missing?

How is it possible to parent your children the same, and yet, have one who seems emotionally mature and on target, and another who appears to be stuck in juvenile behavior, unable to control his or her impulses?

No Rules for Conscious Parents

Conscious parenting has no tricks to follow - only a path led by your heart and intuition. 

Development takes time. Maturity is achieved after a long childhood and after years of trial and error.
 
Not after you say, "No."
Not after you give the "limit."
Not after you use a "consequence."
 
But with time + tools. So give yourself a break.

Download a copy for yourself. http://bit.ly/1jLX42d Hang it up and remember, it's about being conscious - not perfect.

Your children weren't made to follow orders. They'll get it eventually - even if it takes some tears and repetition. 

Don't give up. Your child is worth it. SO ARE YOU.

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Development Takes Time, Repetition & Relief

Developing maturity takes time, repetition and relief.

Time is necessary to allow a child's unique developmental path to unfold.  

Repetition happens when we practice moving through strong impulses and overwhelming emotions.

Relief happens when we feel that we have the support and/or the tools to move through a situation. 

Why Your Words Matter

"Stupid, stupid… you’re such a dummy!" my father muttered to himself, over and over, as he paced the house. 

As a child, hearing my dad call himself names was unsettling. Now, as an adult with a child of my own, listening to him berate himself over a lost set of keys was eye-opening.

5 Secrets to Building More Influence With Kids

Most of the time our efforts to combat negative behavior get caught up in COMBAT. Tears and exhaustion reign and power rules.

Whose power is ruling, though? It depends on the day.

You might hear a "No" - especially a repeated NO - and assume your child wants to cause trouble or get his way. You may regard this kind of behavior as a threat to your authority and sense willful disobedience.