Are you in the driver's seat of your emotions? Who is in your head directing your behaviors and reactions?Most of us operate on auto-pilot, unaware of how our history is influencing the script.
The first step to taking back your power involves understanding your past.
Dr. Gabor Maté passionately stresses the link between healthy attachment and brain health revealing that our ability to function, manage, adapt, and cope in the world can all be traced back to our earliest relationships.
In his book, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction, Dr. Maté writes about addiction, not from the perspective of examining the weak-willed and flawed individual, but by recognizing what much of medical science has ignored - that the disease of addiction stems from "a complex interplay among personal history, emotional and neurological development, and brain chemistry..."
That "complex interplay" of variables is driving your behaviors today.
You may not be an addict in the sense of relying on drugs or alcohol to calm you. But, many of us self-medicate or numb our feelings in other ways:
Overworking
Shopping
Eating
Watching TV
Play Video Games
Sometimes, our behaviors are addictions we can't release. We constantly ---
Overreact.
Get angry.
Act bossy.
Demand our way.
Because they makes us feel safe, relaxed or in control. It's the release of tension that we're really after.
We're emotional junkies and we end up relying on something outside of ourselves to cope. Namely, other people's behavior.
These unhealthy patterns sap our energy and damage our most precious relationships.
We teach our children to cope with their frustration by using power, aggression, and force.
I know you strive to be peaceful and teach your kids to handle their emotions in positive ways, but did you ever learn that for yourself?
Sometimes, the behavior that challenges you the most is the catalyst for your own growth and healing.
It's not that your kids won't "listen, comply, agree," or "be good" - it's that you need to take a step back and take a long look in the mirror if you want to change your reactive habits.
In this TEACHable Moments video, I'm sharing 5 steps to taking back your power so you won't be offended by your kids or ruled by your unconscious memories.
After you watch, I'd love to hear from you. Leave a comment down below and tell me your #1 biggest reactive habit and what unmet need is driving it! And if you want to make big changes in the level of cooperation in your home - sign up for my free video series.
Thank you so much for watching and please remember, it's about being conscious - not perfect!
Talk soon,
Lori
Sometimes, the behavior that challenges you the most is the catalyst for your own growth and healing.
It's not that your kids won't "listen, comply, agree," or "be good" - it's that you need to take a step back and take a long look in the mirror if you want to change your reactive habits.
In this TEACHable Moments video, I'm sharing 5 steps to taking back your power so you won't be offended by your kids or ruled by your unconscious memories.
After you watch, I'd love to hear from you. Leave a comment down below and tell me your #1 biggest reactive habit and what unmet need is driving it! And if you want to make big changes in the level of cooperation in your home - sign up for my free video series.
Thank you so much for watching and please remember, it's about being conscious - not perfect!
Talk soon,
Lori
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