Busy parents can be quick to dismiss behavior at face value, taking it personally or ignoring the force driving the behavior especially when they are feeling stressed or pulled in too many directions.
I was feeling drained and disconnected, and I didn't even know it - but my six-year-old daughter did.
So, I had to plug in and get reconnected so that I could uncover the emotional gold hiding underneath her actions.
In this video, I share how I discovered that disconnection (and not her behavior) was the issue and how I learned to look beyond the behavior to figure out what was really going on.
*Note: I didn't express the entire conversation I had with my daughter in the video because it stemmed from a series of discussions with a backstory that would be too convoluted to explain.
The resolution to our conflict only worked at that moment because I used clues from the past to investigate, comfort, and try to connect with my child, so she could discharge upsetting emotions.
This is where your personality and the uniqueness of your relationship aid in the recovery of positive behaviors.
It's important to know how your children express anger, and what they need to calm down.
There is a nonverbal dance that goes on underneath the layers of words and investigation.
Let it be instinctive and unforced.
Every conflict is an opportunity for kids to develop their coping skills.
Have your child's true emotions ever been hiding underneath completely unrelated behavior? What did you do to help them process their feelings in a healthy way?
Leave a comment below and tell me about your experience! Your story might just help another parent in need.
Thank you so much for reading and please remember, it's about being conscious - not perfect!
Talk soon,
Lori
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