Have Kids Who Fight? Here's How to Keep the Peace

Picture this...

The fire is crackling, the rain is steadily tapping at the windows, and I'm folding left-over tissue paper cleaning up the remains of another holiday-palooza.

The children are joyfully singing and tattooing each other with facepaint and glitter.
 

There is no stress, no battling, no blaming or feeling like the kids run the house. Even the dog is quiet.
 

Isn't this what we all want? 

The simplicity of peace and enjoying the time together. I was full and content. My whole face was lit up, and I could feel my heart swell with gratitude.
 

Why can't it always be like this?

Helping Anxious Children Manage Scary Thoughts

“My 7-year-old daughter has told me before, "I'm thinking of a bad word, but I know I shouldn't say it." I would respond with, "Well, don't say it." But, last night she wrote to me about how she had a "bad head" because she had a "bad thought." Can it be due to her moderate anxiety and her OCD tendencies? How can I help her when she says stuff like that?” - G

When our emotions hijack our sense of security, we can quickly drop into rigid, obsessive, and even irrational thoughts and unreasonable behaviors.  

How can we respond to our children's scary thoughts and help them to reflect and release any unhealthy thoughts or worrying emotions, so they don't internalize the negativity?

Single Best Strategy for Gaining Your Child's Respect (How to Repair)

There I was, feeling bewildered, and standing outside the door my eight-year-old had just slammed shut after demanding her privacy.

What just happened? 

We were enjoying lunch, I mentioned her dance class starting - and BAM! She turned on a dime. She crossed her arms, glared at me with a squinty gaze, and refused to engage.

Where did I go wrong? Why was she being so disrespectful?

Your children's behaviors may confuse and confound you, too. When there seems to be no rhyme or reason for their actions - when you're faced with defiance - there is one thing you can do to reconnect and teach respect.

Six Ways to Master Communicating With Kids

Sometimes, we provide a lot of commentary around our children’s actions.

We interject where we don’t need to, providing solutions when we should just be there as a spotter is for a gymnast - guiding children as they learn a skill or helping them to manage themselves safely. 

How can you allow your children as much freedom as possible while still maintaining a reasonable set of boundaries and supportive limits?

Want to Change Your Child's Behavior? Share Your Needs.

Sometimes, out of fear and frustration, we end up sending unintentional messages to our kids.

We end up telling them what we think of them instead of sharing how we feel about what's happened and what we would like to happen next. Sharing your needs and preferences builds trust and increases cooperation.

How to Talk to Your Kids About Lying

Nope, wasn't me - no way, no how!

Lying. That uncomfortable and trigger-producing behavior which freaks you out is actually a natural step in your child's development track.

When it comes to our children lying, I think we should be aware of it - but not in fear of it.

How Do I Get My Kids to Be Kind to One Another?

Have you ever felt as though your kids have no respect for each other? Or, maybe their language and interactions could use an infusion of kindness?

Sometimes, it's easy to look at sibling or peer conflicts and determine what's wrong, judge it, and then, declare for our children what's fair and right (aka - what should happen next).

But, have you ever looked for the source of your unease with their conflicts on the inside instead of on the outside?

Want Your Kids to Share Their World With You? Try this.

My daughter's "first day of school jitters" got me thinking about the messages we send kids when we don't listen to their fears. 

I mean really listen.

We tell them so much by how we respond (or avoid) their attempts to connect with us emotionally.