Sometimes, out of fear and frustration, we end up sending unintentional messages to our kids.
We end up telling them what we think of them instead of sharing how we feel about what's happened and what we would like to happen next. Sharing your needs and preferences builds trust and increases cooperation.
Can you remember a time when someone said to you -- "I'm so disappointed in you" or "What were you thinking?"
How did you feel? Did those words produce the experience of feeling calm, reflective and resourceful?
Did you pause to consider how your actions affected others or feel compelled to contribute to the change or did you just feel bad about yourself, and maybe even a little bit embarrassed?
