What Rules Your Behavior (& How to Take Back Your Power)

Are you in the driver's seat of your emotions? Who is in your head directing your behaviors and reactions?
 
Most of us operate on auto-pilot, unaware of how our history is influencing the script.

5 Secrets to Building More Influence With Kids

Most of the time our efforts to combat negative behavior get caught up in COMBAT. Tears and exhaustion reign and power rules.

Whose power is ruling, though? It depends on the day.

You might hear a "No" - especially a repeated NO - and assume your child wants to cause trouble or get his way. You may regard this kind of behavior as a threat to your authority and sense willful disobedience. 

What No One Tells You About Gratitude

You've probably heard it before.

"Live in the moment."
"Be grateful."

Ugh - those same old clichés. Always said at just the WRONG time.

What does that even mean? Live in the moment. What other moment is there to live in? And grateful? Yeah, that's easy for some people to say.

I'll admit that sometimes I not only let those kinds thoughts creep into my mind, but I let them take up residence.

The Truth About Arguing

Do you let your kids argue with you or with each other?
 
When I was growing up, my love of debate and my direct, logical manner was often misinterpreted as anger or rebellion. My intention to engage others in a thoughtful dialogue was misread as being stubborn and argumentative.

Growth Happens When You Aren't Looking

Welcome to the January 2014 Carnival of Natural Parenting: The More Things Stay the Same

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have talked about the continuity and constancy in their lives. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

When you decide to raise a child without punitive consequences, you will likely be questioned and admired - and also booed, blamed and thought to be irresponsibly contributing to the downfall of society.

You will need the strength of Hercules and the patience of Mother Teresa because growth is sometimes slow to see, but that doesn't mean just because everything looks the same – that nothing is changing.

Why Empathy Doesn't Work - 5 Strategies to Help Kids Express Themselves

When you make the switch to being more conscious and aware of your words and actions - using empathy becomes your "first aid" for negativity. 

Empathy allows us to move through our emotions so we can regain control of our thoughts and behaviors, but for children, self-regulation is a skill which takes time to develop.

You may want (or expect) immediate change. When you are new to parenting with empathy instead of control (and even if you aren't), you may find yourself thinking, "I'm using empathy but my child still won't listen."

When Your Toddler Wants to Give Back the New Baby

So tell me, has this ever happened to you?

You bring home the new baby and your older child reacts by demanding that you immediately return the tiny, wailing human to the hospital (or trade "it" in for a puppy), and no amount of consoling, controlling, punishing or gentle reminding can contain his mounting frustration and loose limbs?