Are you a yeller? I know this one all too well.Just ask my kid how I could be a better mom, and she will likely tell you, "She shouldn't yell so much."
Ohhh, how I try!
I recently watched the documentary The Lottery of Birth and was reminded of how little awareness I sometimes have when it comes to my behaviors, beliefs, and habits, which are mostly unconscious and automatic.
We are just an amalgam of everything we've ever heard, seen, and read. Rarely, do we escape the influences of the world around us, and specifically the patterns of those closest to us.
So, our kids will mirror for us those exact behaviors which we are unaware of. I grew up in a family where everyone yelled, even if they were saying, "I love you."
"Man will become better when you can show him what he is like."
- Anton Chekhov
You might yell if your parents did or maybe when you:
feel unheard
feel frustrated
feel stressed and without resources
want more choice
desire more recognition
have unmet needs
We can adapt our behaviors and learn to cope when we consciously choose to be aware. But sometimes, we get stuck in that place of, "What do I do now?"
In this episode of TEACHable Moments, I'm sharing
5 action steps you can start doing right now to stop yelling!
Your family history will tell you a lot about the root cause of your yelling.
When your child disagrees with your limits and shows you with huffing and puffing, yelling, or threats of destruction, you may be used to reacting by matching his intensity. You may want to prove your point or your power by arguing, and/or trying to provide endless reasons for why you are rightly enforcing this limit.
When you take the time to be conscious, you won't allow your unconscious fears and automatic reactions to take over. Instead, you'll gradually improve your ability to maintain your composure, even when your children can't!
So, I'd like to know - what is your new plan? What tools can you use to engage your senses and calm down when your kids can't?
After your watch, share your ideas in the comments because you just might inspire someone else toward the change that they were needing!
Thank you so much for watching and remember, conscious - not perfect!
Talk soon,
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