Do you feel like you are always begging, pleading, or insisting that your kids do things?
Has your day-to-day routine lost all sense of play and the lightheartedness that should accompany family life?
When my daughter is resisting everything I say or when it feels difficult to relate to her, I know it is imperative for me to take a look at how often I choose to demonstrate a loving, fun, and calm presence in her life.
How do I act most often when I'm feeling frustrated or facing an obstacle?
I'm her model.
If I lose it during those times, how can I expect her to be cooperative and feel connected when she's stressed?
It is during our most tumultuous and taxing times that we show our children just how tolerant we really are.
If you become angry and controlling when your kids step outside the boundaries, their natural curiosity and love of life may take a detour and spiral into self-serving negativity.
When children are handled harshly or feel dominated by the people they rely on to provide comfort and safety, they tend to gravitate toward one of two states:
- reactive and impulsive
- passive and indecisive
Chronic stressful interactions create an elevated level of stress hormones which causes real physiological changes in the body. In this state, our capacity to switch gears and adapt our thinking and actions is limited.
And, more importantly for our children, we interrupt the developmental process by shutting down vital neural structures that regulate self-control and decision-making.
If you dread starting the day because your home has become a battleground - this TEACHable Moments video is for you.
I'm going to show you how to bring back the love, fun, and calm - not in a way that points out flaws or says, "You're not obeying the rules," but in a way that tells your kids, "You're having trouble. Let's take some deep breaths and remind ourselves of what's important."
Stress makes us stupid and gets us stuck. (Tweet It!) Fun-loving moments of connection form a bond of trust that is unbreakable and influential to the growing brain.
Being playful and curious reminds kids that everyone messes up sometimes, and the best learning happens when you're linked at the heart level.
After you watch, I'd love to know which strategy spoke to you most and how you will implement it with your kids to bring back the love, fun, and calm in your relationships!
Leave me a comment and share your story! You never know when your thoughts might be just the inspiration someone else needs to make the changes they were looking for.
Thank you so much for watching and sharing. Have a great week and remember, conscious - not perfect!
Talk soon,
Lori
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